Friday, August 17, 2007

Best Police Beat Ever!

In the spirit of Mat's BYU reminiscing, click here to read the best BYU police beat ever. I already e-mailed this story to some of you, but deemed it worth posting for everyone's enjoyment.

6 comments:

  1. Regan loved this. My favorite part: "Incidents of a similar nature have occurred about two dozen times in the past." As the kids on the internet say, WTF!?

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  2. It still doesn't beat the infamous "Scissors man" incidents that were going on while I was on campus.

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  3. Herb, please elaborate!

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  4. Wait, I do remember something about a guy who would sneak up on girls who were asleep in the library and give their clothes a little snip with scissors. Is that it?

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  5. Happy to elaborate, Rob. This was, I think, during the 90-91 school year. These events took place in the HBLL, which for those unfamiliar with BYU is the main library, a fine facility used by the students in about equal parts for studying, socializing, and sleeping between classes.
    Some pervert was going around finding sleepy coeds in the HBLL and cutting holes in their clothing in strategic locations while they slept. Some would not even realize what had happened until later when they found the holes. Regular reports started showing up in Police Beat, and the perpetrator was soon named "Scissors Man." A few coeds woke up with a man standing close to them that quickly left as they roused. At first they would think nothing of it, but then realize that they had just had their clothing cut also. From these witnesses a composite drawing was made of the perpetrator and published in the Daily Universe.
    A sort of mania gripped campus, as everyone was talking and joking about Scissors Man. The Student Review published fake ads for scissors and articles lampooning the Scissors Man coverage in the Daily Universe. One student turned a found driver's license in to the police, because the picture on it looked something like the scissors man composite. One young woman reported that while she was out someone broke into her apartment and cut the crotches out of some of her clothing. (This was probably just a misguided attempt to get attention). Eventually the "attacks" in the HBLL and the media coverage just died off. Scissors Man was never identified or apprehended. That is the story of Scissors Man, and just think, somewhere out there in Mormondom this guy just might be floating around still.

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  6. I don't know about "best" police beat. I recall one printed my sophomore year of high school involving several teens running around in jock straps . . .

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