Friday, October 12, 2007

Check Out This Sweet Post

I stumbled upon this awesome post over at Mormon Mommy Wars. It has a bunch of "funny things that happened at church" with an emphasis on crazy fast and testimony moments. Give it a looksee.

Our ward in Provo was always pretty calm. I don't remember any real crazies at church. One time one of the priests was giving the closing prayer in sacrament meeting and started giving the sacrament prayer instead. As a missionary in South Korea I somehow avoided having too many weird experiences at church. We never had anyone crazy wander in, although we did have an unofficial janitor who lived in the basement of the church. One night we were having an open house at the church and he wandered in drunk. He was an older guy who had learned English from the soldiers during the war, so he knew some choice words which he proceeded to use. I can't remember how my companion and I convinced him to settle down, but we eventually got him to leave. It wasn't long after that that they found him some housing elsewhere.


  1. My ward in Provo, just down the hill from you, was CA-RAZY. Examples:
    1) We had an old woman say in testimony meeting that Jesus came to her and told her to start walking and not to stop until the millennium started. On her way out the door, her sister called her and, because she stopped to take the call instead of walking like Jesus told her to, she was responsible for delaying the millennium.
    2) After Pres. Clinton was elected, a woman got up in testimony meeting and testified that she knew all democrats were going to hell, even President Faust.
    3) A woman regularly got up in testimony meeting to say that she knew everyone in the ward hated her because she was more beautiful than they were.

  2. oh man, we have a lot of crazies out here, let me tell you. We're not in the really nutty ward though, that's just north of us.
    But we have a lot of people that feel like they've been "called" here to Jackson county to set things up for the 2nd coming. And they're not afraid to talk about it a whole bunch. My opinion--if you do get a call like that, keep it to yourself, ok? It scares me a little.
    And then we always have the people that get up in fast and testimony and talk for 15 minutes and you can't understand them at all. Or how about the guy with Terrets that stood up in the middle of sacrament meeting the other day (while he was sitting in our pew, by the way) and starting saying DAMN over and over?
    Or how about quoting from the "Lost Books of Eden"

    That just gives you a taste of how it is out here.

    Rob, how's your ward where you are right now? Are you in a student ward?
    How about everybody else that's not in good old UT??

  3. Hello provonians. I'm just going to jump in with two quick stories. First, while I was a young missionary in Berlin, an extremely tall woman showed up for fast and testimony meeting. She resembled Big Bird. She got up to bear testimony, which quickly turned to a life history. I was new to the mission so my language skills were not that sharp, but I was able to learn after a while that she was once a he. She had just completed her transformation. First time that I had heard that kind of "conversion" story on fast and testimony meeting.
    Second: In California, one woman went into great detail of the story of how her father had killed her mother. Every baby was crying in the chapel.

  4. Why don't I ever get to hear any of this kind of stuff?!?
    Lost Books of Eden? Yes!!!

    Ginna--Our ward is solid. I'm consistently impressed with our members. It seems like every program in the church is run really well and the youth are just fantastic. We're in a family ward that picks up a lot of the married students. The Stake has a university ward for all of the singles <30.